Sure, it’s easy to tell someone off with a string of four-letter words. But doing it clean? That takes creativity, precision, and just the right amount of petty 😌✨
Someone asked people online to share their favorite insults that don’t use any swear words at all, and the results are savage and safe for work. Here are some of the best ones making the rounds:
😂 The PG Burn Book:
1️⃣ Oscar Wilde-level classy: “Some people bring joy wherever they go. Others, whenever.”
2️⃣ “If you were any simpler, you would need to be watered twice a week.” 🌱
3️⃣ “Snake mittens.”(Useless. Completely useless.) 🐍🧤
4️⃣ “Thanks for helping! It was like doing it by myself… but harder.”
5️⃣ “May your days be as pleasant as you are.” ☀️😐
6️⃣ “I envy the people who never met you.”
7️⃣ “Well, you did your best, and that’s what’s so sad.”
8️⃣ “Wisdom is chasing him, but that man can run.” 🏃♂️💨
9️⃣ “I envy the simplicity of your perspective.”
🔟 “We have something in common: Neither of us knows what you’re talking about.”
1️⃣1️⃣ “Get well soon.”(No explanation needed.)
1️⃣2️⃣ “You think you’re a wit, but you’re only halfway there.”
1️⃣3️⃣ “You have the confidence of someone who’s never been fact-checked.” 📚
1️⃣4️⃣ “I can explain it to you, but I can’t understand it for you.”
1️⃣5️⃣ “Somebody needs a diaper change.”
1️⃣6️⃣ “I have neither the time nor the crayons to explain this to you.” 🖍️
1️⃣7️⃣ “You’re why the Power Rangers had to yell out their colors.”
1️⃣8️⃣ “Your brain has too many tabs open.” 🧠💻
1️⃣9️⃣ One person said they got Facebook-jailed for calling someone an “ignorant potato”, and now it’s their go-to insult 🥔
2️⃣0️⃣ And finally, someone said they heard “unfrosted Mini-Wheat” used as an insult and immediately stored it for future emergencies 🥣
✨ Moral of the story: You don’t need profanity to be brutal. Sometimes the cleanest insults are the ones that cause the most EMOTIONAL DAMAGE 😇💀
Which one are you stealing for later?